Oh Dear Lord

I bring this upon myself. Oh and my brother John.
We cleaned the house top to bottom today. This house has been struck with unspeakable ailments. I will spare you the gruesome details. In the process of our cleansing we came upon a few empty frames. Feeling the need to fill them I set out into our closet where all the photos are stored. Well, low and behold these wondrous shots of the past.






If you've caught your breathe from laughing I'll begin...
Oh Nelly! These are priceless. Right outta the Sears Roebuck 70's catalog. The only way I could try and help these look cool was to shoot them on my sleek iMac keyboard... I failed.
Where shall I begin? How's left to right?

1. That's me on the right. The one my brother John is giving the hiemleck to. The look on my face says it all... "eh?" From this photo shoot am I going to paint a house?

By this photo someone could suggest our future careers. John a personal fitness instructor and I a Dutch House painter. Eash.

2. Big Red. I have Photoshop but there is only so much color correcting you can do to a completely red photograph. I know it's a Christmas shot but where's the green? I actually remember this picture. I think it was taken at a bank in Medford Square.
It has my trademark model look. "Eye's Wide Shut". To this day I still do this. I can now track down why I do this. My eyes are closed because the little girl behind me is talking to me and I'm trying to calm myself through meditation. Nice use of creepy living dolls decorating the tree. Holy Freaky Set. Yea, this was a great idea. Kids will love this. Good Lord.

Fortunately for me Big Brother John takes the harder hit on this one. Those pants are (As Napoleon Dynamite would say) sweet. My Mom claims at the time John was a big Mr. Furley fan from "3's Company"... who wasn't?

From this fashion statement I determined that I did not get my creativity from my Mother.

3. Let's migrate east to this stylish number. At first glance the collars look like giant hideous bows. No no. My Mother wasn't that blind. They are much more manly. YEA! This outfit says "I'm a Bad ass!" And I will likely need back-up wearing this so we are a duo. And together we will both get are asses handed to us.

This scene says two wusses walking in a park suddenly stop... No, Not hold hands... No. We just rub fingers as if it's a hidden love we must hide.

4. Finally number 4. Red & Green. We clearly rock the color red so Mom mixed it up a bit. Work in that Green velour. This isn't John & Michael this is Helmut & Schnitzel. And hey... the stylist missed pulling my collar out of my dress.

Thanks Mom!
Love ya!